A Ripple Pauses
At some point, I will be asked, or I will ask myself, why am I doing this? I am putting my thoughts and some secrets on paper for everyone to see. Will that be in tones of “What the hell are you thinking?” Or maybe I wish I could do that. Time will tell. Are you trying to be some influencer? Are you getting paid for this? The answer to that right now is no to money and probably yes to the influencer thing. A man’s voice of time, and experiences in a large stadium filled with so many voices, too many screaming, holding a fluttering banner…. I am here!
The Influencer Thing
Being an influencer is older than our time on this earth. The oldest influence is still in play… religion… and I am not touching that…no way…no matter how. Moving quickly past that, our lives have many influences. The whole gambit is out there waiting for you, stalking you, plotting to take some of your hard-earned money. Commercials are an influencer and a big one, their never-ending messaging. Music, politicians, your friends, you’re not-so-friends, books, newspapers, Facebook, Instagram… the list goes on and on. Information and disinformation are coming right at you 24/7. Some of us buy in real heavy, controlling our lives, our thoughts, and who we associate with. I expect the influencers we choose will have a large part in who we become or are at any moment in time.
I sat and waited outside in a downtown area a few weeks ago. As expected, people came and went in pairs, one-offs, or small packs. The vast majority were much younger than I. In my teens, university, and work, smoking was everywhere—in planes, restaurants, theatres, workplaces, beaches, and streets. Endless cigarette butts dancing somewhat crushed and discarded on the floors, roads, food courts everywhere and anywhere. Dirty, full ashtrays on every table. Carloads of kids were stashed in cars in a thick fog of smoke. It was everywhere, one’s life in a haze of smoke. For some, like my stepfather, it was the first thing they did in the morning, along with coughing up a lung. I remember him one day while sitting on the stairs leading to the bedroom with his ever-present Buckingham lit, holding it up in front of his face and saying convincingly that it would take more than this to kill him. He was right, as it was a combination of tobacco and alcohol in a raging decades-long battle to see who would take him out first.
Where is this line of thought leading? You ask? While sitting at that downtown location, I realized a significant substitution had occurred. A cell phone has replaced the ever-present, must-have package of cigarettes, almost the same size. Now, a phone marks your pocket or finds a home in a purse; it’s often not close enough. Instead of a cigarette dangling out of your mouth, there’s a cell phone jammed right in your face.
During the smoking era, most people couldn’t go over 15 minutes without lighting up another cigarette. Many of us can’t go 15 minutes without staring at our screens—the screens of our lives. The haze of smoke that once dominated our existence has transformed into mundane, brief conversations full of nothingness. Constantly chased by annoying ads targeting us, following us like a puppy dog, trying to influence our decisions.
The Mundane Side of Life
I owned a marine retail establishment for 36 years. Yes, I did okay…. I sold many boats… opportunities for a family’s entertainment. I wrote a book on retail sales and taught sales, boat show tactics, body language, and what is unsaid. Sales is primarily communication, verbal and nonverbal. You learn to watch people for clues, who they are, and how they think. You want to understand the decision maker and who has the most significant influence in the family or outside. A journey to fulfil their needs and aspirations. Unfortunately, we have lost the ability to communicate face-to-face with fewer hidden agendas for too many days.
The Date
After a long day at a boat show, my staff and I were at a steakhouse. We sat at an exposed table, to all there, no hiding, as were all the tables now at any place to eat, reviewing the day’s business. A young couple sat down across from us at a table for two, appearing somewhat uncomfortable and new to each other. Not much later, I noticed with the movement that they both had their cell phones out and right in their faces, essentially hiding from each other. The silence lasted for some time, though sometimes a quiet snicker or other sound interrupted it. They were in my direct line of sight, so it was difficult not to see them. Their thumbs were busy…so they were texting. They were not directly conversing and were less than three feet apart. Finally, when one looked up at me as if saying hello, or wanting a time out, I asked…. are you texting each other? Sheepishly, he said…yes!
As I Rant On
From time to time, let’s evaluate our lives, contrasting our present selves with our desires. That includes our influencers. Are they the right ones or the trendy ones? Our lives should be larger than the 2” x 4” screen that seems to dominate our lives. Our days are filled with sunrises, sunsets, light, birds, clouds, the simple movement of leaves, food, and the laughter of friends. That includes me!
